MARKET WATCH COLUMNIST
FOX NEWS OPINION: Ellis Henican August 4, 2011 www.foxnews.com
Just in time for back-to-school, here comes the Bazooka Boost.
According to a new study in the brainy Journal of Adolescence, eighth-graders who chew gum during math class and homework time score higher on standardized tests than their empty-mouthed classmates.
Take that, Assistant Principal Lockjaw! How much longer ‘til Dubble Bubble is served in the cafeteria? Aren’t school districts across America trying everything but dynamite to lift math scores?
Researchers at the Baylor College of Medicine in Houston aren’t certain why gum chewing might raise grades. They say maybe the chewing motion increases blood flood to the brain. Or maybe repetitive chewing reduces stress. The researchers didn’t mention one other obvious possibility that some 13-year-olds might: It’s really fun making that irritating popping sound in class.
“We did not explore the mechanism behind this relationship,” lead author Dr. Craig Johnston said. “However, there is
research demonstrating an increase in blood flow in the brain during chewing.”
So don’t be surprised, when the children return to the classroom, if some begin agitating for a change in the no-gum rule. What’s a few wads beneath the desktops or a few stuck-in-the-hair emergencies compared to higher test scores and better college college prospects?
But wait!
Some cynical teacher is sure to point out one important fact: The Baylor study was paid for by the William Wrigley Jr. Co., the Chicago-based gum giant. The Doublemint Twins may not have a problem with that. But some teachers might.
The classroom exchange that is sure to follow is what educators like to call “a teaching moment.”
Teacher: We can’t trust this study.
Eighth-grader: It’s in a magazine with very small print.
Teacher: Don’t Wrigley and the researchers have a conflict of interest here?
Eighth-grader: Tell you what. Just for the sake of science, I’ll volunteer to chew gum in class for the rest of the school year. We’ll see how my grades turn out.
Chew on that!
E-mail ellis@henican.com.
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When I started elementary school it was 1956 and we were headed for the A Bomb scare and going under the desk. My pre war building actually had a fall out shelter and Oklahoma featured a beautiful 17 year old actress named Shirley Jones.The only gum I remember was Bazooka and you got a free comic inside. I soon ditched it because it was a big chunk and was difficult to drench. I was never much of a gum chewer and I would caution kids to chew sugarless gum to preserve their dental health.My theory about the story above is that maybe the repetitive and monotoned chewing may in some way be perceived by the Central Nervous System as some type of invigorating activity and affects concentration in a positive stimulus.